I Need a second girlfriend.
One with naughty-filled boobs, bisexual tendencies and a philosophical thought train.
Actually – genius idea! – I could find three girls that each have one of those properties. Although….juggling three extra girls would be difficult. And the bisexuality and philosophicality both require boobs to really work right now.
So juggling one extra girl…Could I do that? I battle having just one girl and fitting in friends and family.
There’s a further complication: Someone convinced me to join a gym. She didn’t even try. I think she hypnotises people these days. She just looks at them and lowers her top and they do anything she wants. She even flustered the gay guy signing us up at the gym so much, he accidentally stole her ID. Or maybe I flustered him. He was quite cute. Bright eyes. Cool hair. A bit skinny, but gym has bulked him up.
A boyfriend of course is another option but they don’t normally have the sort of boobs I’m after. I think it’d be concerning if they did. Or a medical marvel.
But yes, a gym. I really am shocked. I have a card and everything. Apparently, I suggested we’re going Monday night after work. That’s quite scary. I don’t remember doing any such thing. As far as I’m concerned, gyms are torture chambers controlled by people with an odd definition of the word “endorphin”. And yet…I’m signed up for three years.
Seeing as I’ve been forced into joining, I reckon it’s only reasonable I spend some time there. I may as well get my money’s worth out of it – whatever that worth is. Hopefully a body with more energy. Hopefully a bit more control and muscle. Hopefully a happier outlook.
And hopefully lots of boobs.
Not mine of course. Girls’ boobs. Surely there’ll be lots of girls with boobs at the gym? And surely meeting people is a side-effect of joining a gym?
The only concern I have is that the times I’ll be going to the gym are not what you’d call “social” times. They’re more “I-work-and-gym-that’s-all-there-is-to-life” times. At least this means (theoretically) that people there will believe I’m there to gym, not hit on them. So they might be less guarded. But they’ll all be wearing headphones. So I’ll have to mime what I’m after. “Nice tits, can I have your number?”
I don’t think that’ll work. It’s a bit difficult to mime “nice”. The rest though…might get me banned from the gym.
And it’s not like I’d say that anyways. I think I might have a little too much self-respect for that. I think, instead, I’ll just get a t-shirt with this on.
That might work.